why is a day without you so hard?

“you're my love pain”

i'm supposed to

Sunday, January 30, 2011 || 1:58 PM

my MBLAQ download is lagging D: I don't know what to do with this blog. Should I shut it down? :|

dunno.

whatever tomorrow brings i'll be there

Saturday, January 8, 2011 || 3:26 PM

LOL my week.. dnw. My classmate told me that I look more of a guy in my new hairstyle D: then for our project making for Filipino Class, we need to bring our baby pictures.As you may know, I sported this "boyish" hairstyle when I was young, and when my classmates saw it they really thought I was a guy. D:

lmao it just popped in my mind. OMG this banoffee pie-slash-ref cake my mom made is DAEBAK. too abd I got the last slice but asdnasyudguasygda it's so yummy. :DDDDDDD

and I wish you good luck

Wednesday, January 5, 2011 || 8:39 PM

I can't stop spazzing over TVXQ's new MV. I STILL CALL THEM TVXQ. :X Jung Yunho, you're so fine I wanna make you mine lol

So, tomorrow we'll do nothing all morning but practice for our upcoming LYF(forgot what it means lol) and it's a day of pure boring, Onew sangtae-causing dance practices. tbh, I'm not a dancer. I don't have that feet and hand coordination most dancers have. But who cares. XD

I will soon change my layout I know. =)) WOOOOOT

heartbeat

Sunday, January 2, 2011 || 4:01 PM

LMAO I got myself a new haircut, and it’s goodbye Korean Bun Hairstyle for me. It’s pretty short, so I’ll be back to my old ponytails :)) anyway, I’ll be off to school in two days(BOOOOO) and it’s back to my sleep-killing routine. D: As for my computer, I think Dad’s gonna bring it to the repair shop this week. Yay! :))

well that’s all for now. XD

YOU BUTTHURT STALKER

Saturday, January 1, 2011 || 2:19 PM

And the New Year starts off with angst! Anyway, that's how 1-1-11 is going for me. I don't really feel like socializing today since I kinda woke up from the wrong side of the bed.

Please let me rant for a while. Anyway, I feel really sick. Like, really really sick. Physically, emotionally...

All you ever talk about is blah blah this, blah blah that, WELL EXCUSE ME I DON'T GIVE A CRAP ON THAT. I hope you get what I mean. >:/ and now you act like everything's normal and ;owdgjfiudfbgywdvfybdsn vcshd bcfsd

Labels: rant rant rant, screw calm and get angry

CHAMKKANMANYO~!

Wednesday, December 29, 2010 || 7:32 PM

Okay, so it's been a very very long time since I last had my entry, and I didn't like it lol but I'm not deleting it durhurr~ so, my vacation is a hugs W-A-S-T-E. I haven't done anything productive(except from watching Running Man again and again) and I've been such a lazyass. TT_TT

Anyway, Running Man. RUNNING MAN. LOLOLOL I love this show. After I finished watching ShinPD with MBLAQ and Super Junior, I started watching it to ~~perv on~~ watch Joong Ki, but on the first episode I loved it. I also got to know some faces such as Suk Jin, Gary and HaHa(yes, that is HaHa) who are really really funny. The show is really cool and I don't get why it has an average to sorta low ratings.

OMFG the Photo Zone =)) Gary you're such a natural XD and I'm at episode 7 already WOOOT

And FUUUUUUU I was eating dinner while waiting for episode 7 part 3 to load. So, after I finished eating, part 3 was halfway loaded. And WTF Youtube suddenly crashed, causing the loaded vids(ep7 parts 1 and 2) to rebuffer aljbdsugdygasbd so here I am again loading them one by one.

Oh well, RUNNING MAN FIGHTING!!!

Labels: running man

FORGIVE ME.

Thursday, December 16, 2010 || 9:56 PM

Why am I like this? It's the past, but why can't I just get over it and start again? The years ending, a new year will come, but I still feel like I'm on that same stepping stone I was before. No matter how hard I try, I can't get away from it.

I'm the idiot, fine. I wasn't able to get over you when I had the chance. I wasted so much time thinking about something that would never happen. It was my mistake thinking you'd come back to me like before. It was my mistake for loving you more than you would never love me. I was too foolish to believe that your promise was real, when it was never real. I held on so tight to the past, that little did I know, my past was slipping away from my hands. I knew in the first place, that I'll never have you, but I never gave up.

Until now.

Now, that you have someone else. Someone better than the plain, clumsy and immature me whom you never noticed. Someone who would watch over you better than I did. Someone

It was my mistake for being so ambitious that I was taken over by it. I tried reaching for something beyond my feelings and emotions. I was blinded by the sweetness of the past to the bitterness of the present. No wonder I feel like this now.

It was my mistake:

1. For thinking you'd come back to me, yes.

2. For not moving on starting a new life.

3. For not doing anything about the two previous situations.

4. For not making you love me, which I know was too selfish of me.

5. For trying to be happy for you when I know I can't.

난 아직 제자리죠 여전히 그대 곁에서 헤매이다 지쳐서

오늘도 그댈 맴돌다 하루 또 하루 흘러 흘러서 여기까지 온거죠

알면서 아픈 내 맘 알면서도

웃는 그대가 날 더 아프게 하죠

나를 더 사랑하게 만들지 못한 내 잘못이죠

내가 더 사랑해서 만들어버린 내 잘못이죠

내 마음만큼 나를 더 사랑하게 하지 못했었던거였죠 내 잘못이죠

얼마나 더 많은 시간을 눈물을 흘려야하나요 그 약속만을 믿으며

기다려달라던 거짓말 이제 속았던 내 욕심도 지쳐 버리고 만거죠

알면서 아픈 내 맘 다 알면서

그렇게 모른 척 웃을 순 없잖아요

나를 더 사랑하게 만들지 못한 내 잘못이죠

내가 더 사랑해서 만들어버린 내 잘못이죠

내 마음만큼 나를 더 사랑하게 하지 못했었던거였죠 내 잘못이죠

가질 수 없는걸 알면서 멋대로 커진 내 마음이

혼자서 기다리다가 혼자서 후회하다가 사랑한 것도 잘못이네요

아픈 줄 알면서도 잊지를 못한 내 잘못이죠 (내가 참 바보 같죠)

다칠 껄 알면서도 비우지 못한 내 잘못이죠 (내 잘못이죠)

모든 게 내 탓이래도 (모든 게 내 탓이래도) 그래도 괜찮아요 그대만 있다면 언제까지나

이런 날 용서해줘요 그댈 사랑한 날...

Labels: butthurt, mistake